Several definitions have been given for the word friend.[1] Etymologically, the word traces its root to the Old English word “frēond”, the noun form of the verb “frēon” which means to “love, like, honour, set free ( from slavery or confinement). Thus, originally, the word friend means “one who loves”. Whiles love remains a vital pillar of friendship, there are other equally important marks of friendship which deserve recognition. These include but not limited to sacrifice, understanding, support, attention among several others. Thus, acts of friendship must result in the improvement, self- worth, welfare, and better attitudes in the lives of both partners involved. Hence, acts that lead to misery, delinquency, heartaches and generally, the loss of value in the lives of both people involved in the friendship cannot be considered as acts of a good friendship.
In the scripture, we find several examples of people who stood strongly by each other as good friends and helped improved the lives of each other. We cannot talk about such people without mentioning David and Jonathan whose love for each other extended even beyond just themselves. In 2 Samuel, we read of how David run to the aid of his late friend’s son, Mephibosheth, for the sake of the bond of friendship he shared with his father. This benevolent act of David goes a long way to show that, friends do not only look for what they can gain from the other person, but how they can also contribute positively to the lives of their friends.
Other exemplary forms of friendship we find in the Bible include that of Job and his friends who stood by him through his plight, the enviable loyalty and devotion of Ruth to her mother-in –law, Naomi, even Elijah and his servant Elisha, as well as that of Jesus with Mary, Martha and Lazarus who could speak plainly to him despite His status (John 11:21-23). From these examples, it is easy to notice that friendship cuts beyond the boundaries of age, sex, social or even religious status.
A popular Arabian proverb says that: A friend is one to whom one may pour out all the contents of one’s heart, chaff and grain together knowing that the gentlest of hands will take and sift it, keep what is worth keeping and with the breath of kindness, blow the rest away. It is thus safe to conclude that: a friend is someone who picks you just as you are and leaves you better than he found you.
